Tues. Aug. 16: Did normal routine and focused on trying to find "suchness feel" while falling into ease (without having to individually or chronologically go through and check each of the 13). At first this is impossible, regardless of how hard I try I am not able to achieve adequate looseness at the beginning. After a couple rounds of Bitter Pill the body starts to let go a little. As I got into waving the softness started to arrive but it was still a conscious effort. So i redirected my focus to open awareness and finding neutral. For some reason this shuts down all the analysis and the body responds. So it seems that getting the meat sunk, condensing the yin and expanding the yang and suspending the crown all happens simultaneously IF i don't THINK to do it. When i imagine an opponent in front of me reaching out to grab me I can drop into this state automatically, but if I'm trying to work on all the points in a "practice" way then it becomes mechanical and doesn't happen.
Issues I'm noticing is that upon getting the alignment everything is fine, but a few moments after initiating movement the mingmen wants to close a little and I have to bring it back open. More than likely due to my lower back and pelvic tissues not being released enough yet. This also happens in the trap and cervical region. Also, when I concentrate on "up the back and dropping down the front" I get a very nice sense of relaxation and ease but after a second I notice that there is a slight "bow" in the thoracic spine and the lumbar spine gets a small "sway" instead of the smoother straighter elongated look, and it seems that my main focus point is in the mid-back instead of mingmen. Perhaps I'm not taking it far enough. Also worked on the Hung and Ha sounds and the fajin throwing hands exercise. I have a problem tightening up on the explosion instead of releasing. If I start out slowly I can do it more correctly, but i am guessing that doing this slowly defeats the purpose of the exercise.