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TJ May 24


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Tues. May 24:  Followed class video from Sunday - feel that I'm feeling a more natural expand and condense, but having trouble maintaining the big toe energy.  When I consciously maintain big toe energy I feel tension all through my legs and back, when I relax into the bones the big toes want to come up off the floor.  Practiced with a mirror beside me and am getting a better feel for perineum down and mingmen open especially after ready stance crown positioning drill.  Noticing that my pelvis wants to go back a bit on down the front, maybe just not opened up enough yet.  Although, I can keep the alignment but I don't really go down much, if any at all.  Feeling a little upper body tension during zhuan zhang, also feel like my center of mass is a little high, like if someone came and touched me I'd fall backward easily.  Overall feeling more stable but still not letting go enough while maintaining aligment principles.  Also feel like my open and close is all muscular.


Don't worry about muscular or not muscular, it is unimportant, all movement relies on muscles. What is important that you uncover the deeper connections and specific yin and yang feelings of open and close. A little correct movement is how you begin. As your body trusts that you will stay within the limits, it will reward you with greater range of motion; this is principle-based motion. Then true relaxation is possible. 

Thank you sifu, this is something I worry about a lot. I've come to accept that the opening of my body will take some time, but I still cannot let go of the frustration sometimes when practicing and my body gets really warm from improper movement and alignment.  But I can say that i have noticed that my movement gets a tiny bit better each time, and a little more comfortable also.